Monday, March 10, 2014

Honoring Your Own Pace

I'm a very slow paced, go with the flow kind of girl, but I'm dualistic, so there's a side of me that is impatient as hell. Each side of me fights with the other, a LOT.  I'm a Pisces, we do this. I've got the internal Tortoise/Hare struggle all the freaking time. 

Right now my hare is winning. I am even rushing through my breakfast just so I can finish this post.

What is wrong with me?!

Winter is a good time for the tortoise side of me to take over. It makes sense, since everything slows down in winter.

Now that it is looking like it will finally be spring, I'm getting restless and the hare will take over. The two sides will still fight. Tortoise likes spring too.

The problem with having a dualistic pacing is that I end up being very hard on myself, especially when the tortoise is taking over. This isn't a world where a lot of tortoises are encouraged despite the "take a load off" and "go with the flow" shouts and quotes out there. I doubt there are a lot of people who feel like they can "just relax" or "keep calm..." in today's world.  Nobody wants to be thought of as Slow.

I don't like that aspect of society. I like my tortoise probably more than I like my hare. I really get to use all of my senses when I don't feel like I need to rush off to the next project or the next chore, or the next meal, or whatever.

I complain about being constantly interrupted. I am. I have a 4yo who worships the ground I walk on, but that also means I'm the only one who can do anything correctly in her world.

Sometimes those interruptions make my hare feel in control. He's winning when I have to rush off to attend to the next thing before the next calamity hits.

I'm using my analogy of the tortoise and the hare, but really my power animal is a sloth. I move very very slowly in physical self is extremely slow even when my impatient side is hare side feels extremely irritated with my tortoise/sloth side then.

I lost my train of thought during one of those interruptions I mentioned above. So, my point is this: No matter if you are slow, fast, or dualistically paced, you've got to be easy on yourself and honor whatever pace you're moving at during the different times of your life. If the river is running slowly, (oo, I get to mix my metaphors now) use that sense of slowness to rest or do things that need intense attention to detail. If you're headed toward the rapids, let it happen and go with that flow too.

The idea is not to beat yourself up. I'm good at beating myself up, but it doesn't do me any favors. Even though we often feel inadequate on the journey (inadequacy is a big thing with me too), we shouldn't feel this way because no one is ever really prepared for the things that pop up along the way. A crocodile could jump out of the river and eat the hare! You just never know.

I once read a blog post from James Clear that helped me. Enjoy the system and don't worry about the outcome is another way of saying enjoy the journey, the destination is never quite a certain thing.
"...Goals suggest that you can control things that you have no control over." - James Clear


  1. Loved the honesty of your commentary. It's good to be reminded that not all of us are moving at hyper speed. Even better to acknowledge that we are complex creatures who change and evolve with age and responsibilities. The hardest thing I've had to embrace is the idea of slowing down and not doing anything productive every waking minute. Thank you for reminding me that Mother Nature in her infinite wisdom allowed both the speedy and the slow to survive and flourish. Clearly there's a place for both. I applaud your duality of being. You might want to think of it as two wells of creativity to draw from. Lucky you.

    1. Hello! What a wonderful way to think of my duality! Thank you so much for that inspiration. I hope that your creativity is thriving and I am glad that you stopped by to comment. :)